It is okay not to be okay!

20882887_10155810402134574_772062736839529503_nSomeone special sent me the picture above last week, it just makes sense. I know everyone wants us to be happy but let’s be realistic….we lost Molly two months ago, I am a single father raising two daughters which one just started middle school, and we have a one year old Pug that really misses his mommy. If I told you we were okay, wouldn’t you think I was nuts?

Last week the girls and I were invited to a famous’s person’s house who had lost her husband few years ago, although doing very well she still mourns his loss. Reality is when you loose a close loved one, in a way you never will be okay but it doesn’t mean you won’t ever be happy again. Let’s be clear we are grateful for what we have, we live in a great community who went out of their way to help and comfort us, schools have made sure the girls are supported, we have a small but a great family, and lastly we have the financial means to survive.

Not to put importance on money, but financial security is important. I had a job that allowed me to take two months off and stay with the girls, we get to keep our house and we can afford professional grief counseling. Many families after a lose of a spouse, face major financial difficulties. Some can’t even afford rent and food let alone pay for professional counseling.  If I were to give one advice, it would be to seek professional grife counseling for yourself and the children after a major loss. Young children process death a lot differently than adults. My own daughters can go from laughter to tears in a matter of seconds.

So after having to be at the first day of school for a third grader & a sixth grader today without their mother and starting work again next week if I told you we were okay it would be a lie. This doesn’t mean won’t be okay later, just not now.

 

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